Monday 1st September 1808

Dear Diary,
A better day.
Indeed the sun finally appeared, returned from it's holiday elsewhere. How typical! It is almost as if it decided to shun the summer months out of spite.
I enjoyed one of Mrs Crutchlow's lightly poached eggs and then went out and sat upon Ned's erection. The scents that drifted upon the breeze were pleasant but I was tormented by wasps. I fear if I were to encounter The Almighty, perhaps upon the Knob one day, admiring the view He had created, I would not be able to contain myself and would probably chide Him for His mistake in creating the wasp. What purpose does it serve except to irritate? Never was there such an aggresive insect. No, I fear the wasp is firmamental faux pas.
Ned found me twitching wildly about his seat beating off one of the beasts.
"Mr Austen, I know you have much on your mind at present but if you please I would like to discuss Titty," he said.
"Oh Ned, I am in no mood for your prurient vocabulary. Just because I am engaged does not mean I wish to engage in camaraderous vulgarities with you. Be off and wield your chopper or such like." I sighed.
" I don't know what you mean, Mr Austen but I just though I better let you know that the baby is due any day now and we need to think of what we are going to do next. I am to visit her tomorrow and wondered if it might be a 'fellatious' time for you to attend also, to discuss the plan."
"Ah, yes," I replied, slightly embarrassed, "Titty, yes, er.....good idea.....it would be felicitous, Ned."